Have You Put on Weight? Or Just Changed Shape?

After decades of dieting I have finally worked it out

Photo by Chad Montano on Unsplash

Like a lot of people, I have struggled with my weight over the years. I was always a trim size 10 (UK) and it wasn’t until my 40s that I started gaining a few extra pounds. I even managed to slip back into my size 10 jeans after having a baby.

Yo-Yo Dieting

Here’s how it goes. I jump on the scales and to my horror, discover that a lot of pounds have appeared, as if by magic. I thought my trousers were feeling a little tight. Then I go into a state of mild hysteria, and spiral into a vortex of anxiety and depression.

How can I have gained weight when I have been so good? Cutting out sugar and sweeteners, and not slathering butter on my bread and toast. I even cut out milk in my tea and coffee and monitor my portion sizes. It’s so unfair.

Then one day, I think, damn! Life is for living. So I enjoy mouth-watering crumpets with melted butter oozing all over them, sandwiches with butter on that taste so much better than the cardboard versions before, and so on, all the while keeping an eye on my portion sizes. Sound familiar?

Feeling Good

The secret to looking good is feeling good and that doesn’t mean being stick-thin or looking like you could be blown over in a gust of wind. Robust is good, jolly is fine, and whatever other expression is used to describe people with a fuller figure is absolutely okay.

Accept Who You Are

It is that acceptance of how I look now, having gone up a dress size (or two, sometimes) and then figuring out how to get back into those beautiful clothes hanging in my wardrobe like a carrot dangling on a stick. No! No carrot batons dipped in dust. I jest. The hunger pangs will soon surface and you will end up eating the fridge in sheer frustration.

Instead, learn how to get creative with the clothes in your wardrobe and experiment. Sometimes, wearing loose-fitting clothing can actually make you look bigger. If you can wear figure-hugging tops and some comfortable trousers, that may be a better look for you.

See what suits you and what you feel good in and mix and match tops, skirts, and trousers that normally you wouldn’t team up together. You would be amazed at how many clothes are tucked away in your wardrobe, chest of drawers, and other places. Have a good rummage around and spend time trying things on. Bright colours can cheer you up too.

Body Image

We all know that a lot of people photo-shop their images on social media, particularly celebs. Real life isn’t like that. When we step outside our front door, people see us. Not an air-brushed image with perfect, flawless skin. They see us. A real person with a personality who is kind, thoughtful, helpful, and all the other beautiful attributes that make us who we are.

I hate seeing myself in photographs. I always think how terrible I look, but when I look back over pictures of me when I was in my 30s, I looked pretty good, even though I say so myself, but at the time I can remember thinking how awful I looked. Strange, isn’t it? How we perceive ourselves and how we feel about how we look.

My Secrets

1. Don’t get on the scales. First off, they may not be the most accurate. Secondly, they will play with your mind. Believe me, I should know. After all, a bit like age, it’s only a number.

2. Portion control — the more you cut down, the less you will want.

3. Enjoy your food and don’t overeat. Stop eating when you feel full.

4. Try and avoid processed foods.

5. Cut down on carbs.

6. Eat more fish and vegetables, if you can.

7. Cut down on alcohol consumption or cut it out altogether, if you can.

8. Check out restaurant menus online before you go — it will make choices when you arrive less stressful and you won’t be tempted to choose the first thing you fancy. You will be able to make a more informed choice, particularly as some restaurants now include the number of calories that a dish contains on their menus. Very helpful if you are trying to shift those few extra pounds.

9. Cut out desserts when you go out for a meal but it’s okay to treat yourself occasionally.

10. If you deny yourself too much, you will lose your way. Everything in moderation.

11. Drink as much water as you can throughout the day — don’t worry if you can’t down 2 litres or whatever you think you should drink. Just drink as much as you feel comfortable with. It does help stave off the hunger pangs.

12. Try and do as much exercise as you can, even if it’s walking or some gentle yoga. It will help your mental health and you will feel the benefits too, even if you start with short walks and build up to some longer hikes when your fitness level allows. It’s surprising how quickly you can build up your stamina, but always listen to your body and don’t overdo things. Take up a new hobby that involves getting out and about a bit more.

Conclusion

I keep my weight in check by following the 12 steps above as best I can. It’s not always easy but then life isn’t all fun and games — we have to endure some tough times to appreciate the good times.

Feeling comfortable in your skin and accepting who you are is the key. I hope you feel comfortable in your skin but if you don’t, try to learn how to accept your body shape. We are only on this earth for a relatively short time (in the whole scheme of things) so if we can’t have a bit of fun, enjoy some great food, nice wine, a few beers with friends now and again, and the company of family and friends, then what’s the point of it all? Stop battling those demons and try to strike a balance between enjoying food and not letting it control you.

Like I said earlier: everything in moderation.

Thanks for reading and I hope to see you again on Sunday in Rosy’s Reading Room. You can catch up here.

This article was first published on Medium.